More of Him, Less of Me

At the start of his book, "The Purpose Driven Life", Rick Warren shocks our senses by telling us, "It's not about you." The reason this shocks our senses is that from the moment we enter the world, it sure feels like the world is all about us.

As babies, when we cry, someone tends to our needs. Parents move heaven and earth to feed us, clothe us, house us, educate us, bring us to sporting events, you name it. We make decisions about US. We do things to make US happy. We choose a school and major and a job that suits US. We pick a church that fits OUR needs. We live in a house that WE like.

It sure seems like it's all about us.

But it isn't.

John 3:22-30
22 After this, Jesus and his disciples went out into the Judean countryside, where he spent some time with them, and baptized. 23 Now John also was baptizing at Aenon near Salim, because there was plenty of water, and people were coming and being baptized.  24 (This was before John was put in prison.)  25 An argument developed between some of John’s disciples and a certain Jew over the matter of ceremonial washing. 26 They came to John and said to him, “Rabbi, that man who was with you on the other side of the Jordan—the one you testified about—look, he is baptizing, and everyone is going to him.” 27 To this John replied, “A person can receive only what is given them from heaven.  28You yourselves can testify that I said, ‘I am not the Messiah but am sent ahead of him.’ 29 The bride belongs to the bridegroom. The friend who attends the bridegroom waits and listens for him, and is full of joy when he hears the bridegroom’s voice. That joy is mine, and it is now complete. 30 He must become greater; I must become less.”

Here's the scene.  John the Baptist is doing his job, baptizing people who wish to repent of their sins.  But then he is told that Jesus and His disciples are also baptizing people.  Now at this point you might wonder what John's reaction might be to what some might consider to be a "rival" ministry.  How would you feel if you kind of had the market on something, and you were doing a good job with it, and then all of a sudden someone better than you comes along and starts doing your thing?

In sports, it could be a new underclassman who is just a little bit faster than you, a little bit more skilled.  At work, it could be a new employee who gets work done a little more efficiently, can handle a little bit bigger workload than you.  How would that make you feel?

In team sports, there's only so much playing time to go around.  Every minute one player is in is a minute another player is not.  The coach at Conn College, one of the schools recruiting our daughter Abby to play basketball, told her that he has no problem playing freshmen.  And if you're good enough, you can play right away.  Awesome, right?  What a blessing to get the opportunity to play the first moment you don the uniform.  But what happens if you're a sophomore or junior or senior and a new player comes along who is better than you and gets your playing time?  

In the first instance, it's easy to be thankful to God for His provision and His grace and His blessing.  But what do your prayers look like when things are flipped around?  Do you now pray, "Oh God, why is this happening to me?  Why are you taking this from me?"  These prayers often reflect that we see the world through the lens of....US.

How much of your attitude and perspective is all about you?  

John here points out at the end of this section a phrase that we need to have seared into our brains and into our hearts.  Some translations render it this way:  He must increase, but I must decrease.  As hard as it is to believe, we exist for His purpose and His pleasure, not for our own.  Our life will be more full of peace and joy if we recognize this and seek to increase Him and decrease ourselves, and to remember why we're here in the first place.

Discussion

1.  What is your reaction to the idea that your own life is not about you?  How does that hit you?

2.  Think about your prayer life.  What are the things you tend to pray for?  Do they tend to be you-centered more often than not?  Why?

3.  How often do you rejoice at the success of others?  What if that success comes at your expense?

4.  What are some ways we can rationalize or justify an "It's all about me" perspective?

5.  What would it look like in your life to let Christ increase while you decrease?  Any tangible changes?  What would it look like in your sport to apply this?

6.  Mark 8:35-37 - "35 For whoever wants to save their life will lose it, but whoever loses their life for me and for the gospel will save it. 36 What good is it for someone to gain the whole world, yet forfeit their soul? 37Or what can anyone give in exchange for their soul?"  

Galatians 2:20 - "I have been crucified with Christ and I no longer live, but Christ lives in me. The life I now live in the body, I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me."

What do these two verses say about this topic?  In what way can you say that these passages reflect where you are at?

The Film Doesn't Lie

Former Pro Bowl NFL quarterback, now a television analyst, once said, "The film doesn't lie." What did he mean by that? When looking at the film of a 2015 game between the Philadelphia Eagles and Arizona Cardinals, he said,

"When you look at this, you see every play, every guy, what his responsibility is, and you make a value judgment. I'm not saying I'm always right, but you base it on what you see on the tape."

In other words, the film is Jaworski's best tool for evaluating quarterback play. It's better than on-the-spot gut reaction, because the film reveals things he misses with the naked eye. The film shows things that you just cannot pick up in the moment. Film highlights the things you are good at, and it exposes your flaws and mistakes. You cannot hide from the film.

The Bible often acts as film for us, as we'll see.

John 3:16-21
16 For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life. 17 For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but to save the world through him. 18 Whoever believes in him is not condemned, but whoever does not believe stands condemned already because they have not believed in the name of God’s one and only Son. 19 This is the verdict: Light has come into the world, but people loved darkness instead of light because their deeds were evil. 20Everyone who does evil hates the light, and will not come into the light for fear that their deeds will be exposed. 21 But whoever lives by the truth comes into the light, so that it may be seen plainly that what they have done has been done in the sight of God.

Verse 16 links us to the story Jesus referred to in Numbers 21:4-9. For God loved the world like THAT, that He gave His only Son, Jesus, to pay the penalty for our sin. He then goes on to talk about why it is that some people do not believe in Him. Verse 19 and 20 are key.

(1) People love the darkness instead of the light. Human nature is such that we are sinful. We have a natural disposition towards selfishness, self-centeredness. We want what we want. In a very real way, this explains so much of what we see on television and read in the newspapers. You want to know why there's racism in the world? Sin. You want to know why people beat their children? Sin. You want to know why there is war? Sin. You want to know why there are so many people in jail? Sin. Our natural tendency is away from God and towards self-gratification, even at the expense of others.

(2) We don't want to come to the light for fear that our sin will be exposed. So here's what happens. There are people in the world that are total strangers. Then we meet them and they're acquaintances. Then maybe they become friends. Then perhaps best friends. At each of these levels, what happens in our relationship? We get to know each other better. As we get to know each other better, what is inside us comes out. People who know us better know our hearts better than those who we don't really know. The deeper the relationship, the more vulnerable we get with each other. That means the more our sin is exposed.

And here's the problem. We don't want our sin exposed. We know some of the things we have done in the past, we know some of the things we think in our minds, we know some of the things we desire in our hearts. And we know there is some real ugliness there. Some things that would totally embarrass us if it were known. And so some people, when faced with the prospect of a relationship with God, would prefer to shy away because they'd rather keep doing what they're doing, they'd rather their sin not be exposed, than to be vulnerable and real with their sin.

Here's the thing to remember: God knows our sin. He knows every hair on our head. He knows all our deeds. He knows what's inside our hearts. He knows every thought we have. He understands us better than we understand ourselves. And yet He loves us anyway. That's the amazing thing. In Romans 5:8, we read, "But God demonstrates His own love for us in this: while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us." We can draw near to Him with confidence, without fear.


Discussion
1. We aren't asking you to share any details, but have you ever done or thought anything that you wouldn't want to share with the group because it would be too embarrassing for you or bring you shame?

2. How does our view of God impact our willingness (or lack thereof) to draw near to Him?

3. Jeremiah 17:9 says, "The heart is deceitful above all things and desperately wicked; who can understand it?" How does this speak to the human condition? Why should we pay attention to it?

4. Read Hebrews 4:12-13 - "12 For the word of God is alive and active. Sharper than any double-edged sword, it penetrates even to dividing soul and spirit, joints and marrow; it judges the thoughts and attitudes of the heart. 13Nothing in all creation is hidden from God’s sight. Everything is uncovered and laid bare before the eyes of him to whom we must give account." How does the Bible reveal what's inside us? How does it expose our sin?

5. What does it mean to you that God knows all your sin, and STILL loves you so much that He gave His life for you?

6. How should this give you confidence drawing closer to Him and to other Christians?

7. How can we make AIA a place where people can come and be authentic, without fear of being rejected because of things they may have done?

Listen to the Real Expert

John 3:9-15

“How can this be?” Nicodemus asked. 10 “You are Israel’s teacher,” said Jesus, “and do you not understand these things?  11Very truly I tell you, we speak of what we know, and we testify to what we have seen, but still you people do not accept our testimony.  12 I have spoken to you of earthly things and you do not believe; how then will you believe if I speak of heavenly things?  13 No one has ever gone into heaven except the one who came from heaven—the Son of Man.  14 Just as Moses lifted up the snake in the wilderness, so the Son of Man must be lifted up, 15that everyone who believes may have eternal life in him.”


There are people who are experts in every field. Who would you look to as an expert in, say, music? Medicine? Computers?

There are experts in electrical work, law, medicine, physics, cooking, carpentry, auto mechanics, teaching...you name it. And we look up to them and seek their knowledge in their respective fields. Sometimes we pay them a lot of money for their expertise. But sometimes the experts don't even really "get it".

In John 3, it's clear that Nicodemus is one of these people. He is an expert in spirituality, an expert in Jewish law, and expert in the Scriptures. But he asks Jesus several questions that show he doesn't really understand what Jesus is talking about. "How can this be?" he asks in verse 9. How can a person need to be born spiritually in order to enter the kingdom of God?

It's helpful to understand Nicodemus' frame of reference. He is used to thinking that entrance into God's kingdom is based on a certain degree of obedience to the law. He thinks that the spiritual world operates in the same way that the physical world here on earth does - on the basis of performance. He just cannot grasp that the spiritual world operates by different rules. Namely, that being right with God, that is, being in a relationship with Him, comes by God's grace, His favor bestowed upon us, through faith in Jesus Christ, not by fulfilling a list of dos and don'ts.

To drive this point home, Jesus references a passage Nicodemus would have been very familiar with - Numbers 21:4-9. Let's discuss this passage in small groups.

Numbers 21:4-9
They traveled from Mount Hor along the route to the Red Sea, to go around Edom. But the people grew impatient on the way; 5they spoke against God and against Moses, and said, “Why have you brought us up out of Egypt to die in the wilderness? There is no bread! There is no water! And we detest this miserable food!” 6Then the LORD sent venomous snakes among them; they bit the people and many Israelites died. 7 The people came to Moses and said, “We sinned when we spoke against the LORD and against you. Pray that the LORD will take the snakes away from us.” So Moses prayed for the people. 8 The LORD said to Moses, “Make a snake and put it up on a pole; anyone who is bitten can look at it and live.” 9 So Moses made a bronze snake and put it up on a pole. Then when anyone was bitten by a snake and looked at the bronze snake, they lived.

Questions:


1. How do you think most people answer this question: “Suppose you were to die today and stand before God and He were to say, ‘Why should I let you into heaven?’ What would you say?” How would people most likely answer that question?

2. Read Numbers 21:4-9. Jesus was referring to this incident in verse 14 when He said “as Moses lifted up the serpent in the wilderness…” Read Numbers 21:4-9.
  a. What was the problem here with the Israelites?
  b. What was the consequence?
  c. What was God’s solution?
  d. Who did God extend this offer to?
  e. What would have happened if a person chose to reject God’s offer and try to be saved another way?
  f. In what way is this a parallel to Jesus and the cross?

3. How does this gospel differ from the way that most people think the spiritual realm works (i.e., based on our performance)?

4. What about you? How have you considered the spiritual world and how it works? How different is the spiritual world Jesus describes from how some of the religious "experts" in your life have described it?

5. What is one thing you can do tonight to align yourself rightly in the real spiritual world of grace, mercy, and faith?

The Spiritual Reality

John 3:1-8

​There was a man of the Pharisees named Nicodemus, a ruler of the Jews. This man came to Jesus by night and said to Him, “Rabbi, we know that You are a teacher come from God; for no one can do these signs that You do unless God is with him.”   Jesus answered and said to him, “Most assuredly, I say to you, unless one is born again, he cannot see the kingdom of God.”   Nicodemus said to Him, “How can a man be born when he is old? Can he enter a second time into his mother's womb and be born?”   Jesus answered, “Most assuredly, I say to you, unless one is born of water and the Spirit, he cannot enter the kingdom of God. That which is born of the flesh is flesh, and that which is born of the Spirit is spirit. Do not marvel that I said to you, ‘You must be born again.’ The wind blows where it wishes, and you hear the sound of it, but cannot tell where it comes from and where it goes. So is everyone who is born of the Spirit.”

There is a spiritual reality that exists beyond, but which is connected to, our physical reality. The spiritual reality is harder to understand because it is not something we can physically interact with.

Any created thing world's best when it is functioning according to its design. Our bodies work best when we feed them the right fuel. Our relationships work best when we love and forgive.

We were created as spiritual beings. This means that in order to be the best we can be, we need to be right spiritually.

Jesus says that we cannot enter the kingdom of God unless we have been born spiritually. We need to experience a spiritual birth. This happens when we place or trust in Jesus Christ.

This not only has eternal consequences, it also has an impact on us here and now.


Questions:
1. How would you describe God?
2. Have you had any significant spiritual experiences in your life? If so, would you be willing to describe one of them?
3. When you think of the word "spirituality", what comes to mind?
4. How important do you think the spiritual area of life is for you?  In what waits are you seeking to grow in this area?
5. In what way(s) do you think growing spiritually might help you as a student and an athlete?